Tag Archives: politics

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Posted: 7:34 AM- Rocky takes a couple of punches from his friends
    With a jazz band belting out the “Rocky” theme, Salt Lake City’s mayor was led into the Rose Wagner Performing Arts Center by a troupe of “cheerleaders” waving orange pedestrian flags and wearing “Free-Speech Zone” T-shirts.
    On stage Friday night, Rocky Anderson pumped his fist as the booze-fueled crowd bellowed. Moments later, the mayor would turn red – and sometimes white – during a raucous fundraiser for the Salt Lake Acting Company billed simply as the “Rocky Roast.”
    Between roasts – the panel ranged from former Utah ACLU Executive Director Dani Eyer to Utah radio icon Tom Barberi – Anderson was serenaded by homegrown satirists, the Saliva Sisters.
    Here are some of the best zingers from early in the evening.
    From Eyer:
    Suggesting many Salt Lake City women must have a crush on the “passionate, articulate” Democratic mayor, she said she posed the following survey question to 2,000 women: “Would you have sex with Mayor Rocky Anderson?” The result: “67 percent of Salt Lake City women, when asked, responded ‘Never again.’
    “In 1999, we heard the funniest thing we’d ever heard of – Deedee Corradini was going to sell a block of Main Street to the Mormon Church. Ha, ha, ha. We laughed all the way to the 10th Circuit.  Rocky laughed along with us – for part of the way.”
    From showstopper Jim Braden, spokesman for Salt Lake County Mayor Peter Corroon:
    — “If it wasn’t for Rocky, Merrill Cook wouldn’t have won anything at all.”
    — “Rocky’s legacy: ‘You’re fired, you’re fired, you’re fired, nice tush, and you’re fired.’ ”
    — “Congratulations: being the best-known Democrat in Utah is like being the thinnest guy at fat camp.”
    — “If you can satisfy [House Speaker Greg] Curtis and [Sandy Mayor Tom] Dolan at the same time, you’re probably picking up the tab at the all-you-can-eat buffet.”
    — “I barely recognize him without all his Republican friends nattily draped in those cheesy soccer scarves.”
    — “If you spent more time debating [Real Salt Lake owner] Dave Checketts than Sean Hannity . . . No, no, no – they were robbing Peter [Corroon] to pay Tom [Dolan].”
    — “We know it can’t be easy auditioning to replace Rosie on ‘The View.’ ”
    From emcee Chris Vanocur of KTVX News:
    — “I need to sneak a peek over at the mayor and make sure he’s laughing or he might . . . fire me.”
    — “When Corroon came into office, he was a shy, stiff, bland politician. [But because of Braden. Corroon has magically been transformed into a shy, stiff, bland politician who hates soccer.”